Lucky

I freaked out.
I suddenly wanted nothing to do with a relationship.
It was right there in front of me, and I said no.
I'm leaving for college.
I'm leaving.
Gone.
Do I really want all that baggage?
Do I want to leave for school with a boyfriend of a few months?
He's literally perfect.
But for some reason, something is holding me back.
I'm thinking to myself, he's not Gordon.
He doesn't have any flaws like Gordon.
Because I know Gordon's flaws.
And I grew to love them too.
He's not Gordon.
He's no you.
He's no goofball.
He's mature, and serious.
He doesn't get angry at me, and flip out.
He wouldn't break up with me because of college like him.
He would stand by my side.
But he's no you.
In my heart, there is only room for so much.
I think for right now at least, Pat just needs to be my friend.
Because I clearly have some issues.
And just for the record, it's not like I still want to be with Gordon.
I just want to be happy, which is what I am right now.
Why mess that up?
And anyways, they always say best friends make the perfect match, if you only knew that.