Your Glass House

Today was my brothers birthday party.
I hadn't even thought about the questions I'd be asked by my family.
They haven't seen me in weeks.
But I hadn't even thought of that.
When I was asked how RDA went by my Aunt Julie, I my response was simply, "Wait, you didn't know?"
And from that point on, I knew I was screwed.
My aunt and I haven't gotten along much since she blabbed her little mouth off about me and my pretend date with this boy Nick to his ex girlfriend, neither of which I speak to anymore because of it.
And I was angry with her for a long time.
But when she asked, I decieded to give the full story for the first time to anyone.
As I was telling her, her jaw dropped.
She couldn't believe Becca.
Should could have cared less about Mary though which is funny.
But she couldn't believe Becca would ever do anything like that.
And when I told her the icing on the cake, I began to cry.
The pain ripped through me more than it had previously.

"And when I woke up to see my best friend with my ex boyfriend, who she said she hated because he screwed me up so badly, to see her hugging him, and being all giddy. I couldn't handle it."

I was beyond choked up.
And I hate crying in front of anyone, but especially her.
She felt terrible, but I didn't want her sympathy.
I just wanted her to tell me what I did was the right thing.
I just feel like my heart is so raw.
It's sickening.


You know, you don't talk to me almost all week and then you and your brother decide to comment on my facebook status?
And the crappy part about this is I thought I wouldn't like you anymore.
But I still do.
Stupid, stupid, stupid girl.