Sick

You know, I don't know anymore.
I thought I was better.
I am.
But I thought I was a lot better then I am.
And then Friday night changed a lot.
I felt, wanted in the weirdest way.
Someone was interested in me.
Just for those few hours.
And the feeling of not being no one to someone was so refreshing.
I mean, I have been feeling like a piece of shit for so long now.
Not feeling that way, I had forgotten what it was like.
But for that short time, I just want it back.
That feeling.
It's like I'm craving it.
I just want that ounce of happiness back.
And is it sad, that in just that short amount if time, I could totally see myself with this kid.
Does that make me desperate?
Or does that just mean I actually felt happy?
Or is it just pathetic?
It's all a mystery.
I just want to feel better.
I want to feel okay again.
I just want to feel wanted again.
I just need that small amount of hope.
And I guess my diner boy represents that.